Hipster Douchebaggery

I have a friend who describes himself as a “Hipster“. 

“A hipster is someone who is smart enough to talk about philosophy, music, politics, art, etc. with you all day long, but not smart enough to see how big of a tool s/he is. The only sure fire way to tell if someone you’re talking to is, in fact, a hipster is to ask them “are you a hipster?”. If they respond no, and turn their casette player back on, you can be sure you’re dealing with a hipster.” (Thank you Urban Dictionary!)

What he fails to realize is that by calling yourself a hipster, you are actually the opposite. It’s tough though, because it’s obviously something he really wants to be identified with. He’s had a rough couple of years, so he obviously is trying to find a niche for himself.

Unfortunately, he’s trying way to hard. Seriously, dressing all in black and tweeting about what female fronted indie bands he likes at the moment does not a hipster make. Plus, he’s like almost 40 and is out at whatever hip club of the moment almost every night of the week. Then he complains about never having money…

YOU’RE NOT A GODDAMN HIPSTER!

Just had to get that off my chest. I’m too big of a pussy to tell him that to his face.